Wade E Taylor
In my early days of being a Christian, there were times when
I became spiritually stirred and promised the Lord all kinds
of things. I felt that I had received direction and purpose
and thought, "at last I am on my way." The next
thing I knew, I had fallen apart, and all spiritual vision
and inspiration was gone. Then I picked myself up, shook off
the dust, returned to the starting line and began again.
This pattern may also have taken place in your spiritual
experience, or, it may be a present problem that you are trying
Life is never easy. We all have our ups and downs. There
have been times when I told the Lord, "I will never doubt
you again." Soon, I was saying, "Lord, where are
It is time for us to grow out of these patterns, and begin
to move upward and onward without vacillation. It is very
important that the foundation upon which we stand is the Rock,
our Lord Jesus Christ and that our life is hidden "in
Christ." If our spiritual experience is resting on sand,
that is, if we are trusting our own abilities, we will fail
when the pressures of life increase.
When difficulties affect us and we begin to lose our spiritual
direction, if we will become quiet and look to the Lord, we
will recognize that beneath our vacillations is a layer of
spiritual strength and hope that had been deposited within
us through our identification with Christ in His death and
resurrection and in the peace that came when He took up His
abode within us.
If we will meditate upon our past victories which we gained
through placing our lives in His hands and allowing Him to
work out His purposes through the pressures that we were facing
at that time, we will be encouraged by realizing that He is
well able and willing to bring us through our present difficulty.
This ability to rise above our present difficulty had been
there all through our time of gradually slipping towards darkness.
We needed only to realize that we are a new creation; that
old things have passed away and our life is hid in Him, and
that our strength comes from Him. With David, we can say,
"The LORD is my light and my salvation" Psa 27:1a.
Paul said, "I press towards the mark." The Lord
looks through our vacillations to see if there is within us
"a deep inner determination" to press through to
the place where our responses no longer emerge from our Adamic
nature, but from the new creation that we have become.
Many of us have within us a settled "knowing" that
we have gone too far to go back and that at any price, we
have no choice but to press upward and onward. Once we realize
that we have gone beyond the "point of no-return,"
we can only say, "Lord, for better or for worse, my life
is Yours." The Lord is pleased with this, for He said,
"Blessed are the poor in spirit." That is, "Blessed
are those who have come to the end of themselves, and of their
We are called to be "overcomers." However, we cannot
overcome unless we have something to overcome. Thus, when
one of these "spiritual lows" hits us, we have a
choice opportunity to deny our feelings, refuse to feel sorry
for ourselves, and rise above our circumstances as an overcomer.
"Overcoming" is not seeking to defeat the enemy
in our own strength, but rather to recognize that our Adamic
nature is dead and buried, and that we are a new creation
in Christ, empowered by the Holy Spirit. Then we enter into
His life and overcome in His strength.
The varied struggles that each one of us face are very real.
However, it is not the "struggle" that is important,
but rather the way we view and respond to it. We live in a
worldly environment where all sorts of things war against
us, and many times, it seems that there is more against us
than for us. This gives us ample opportunity to either feel
sorry for ourselves and fall into despair, or to rise above
these things and meet our Lord as an overcomer.
"Deep calleth unto deep. At the noise of thy
waterspouts, all thy waves and thy billows are
gone over me" Psalm 42:7 (Punctuation changed).
There is a desire in the heart of the Lord for a people who
will stand on the bedrock of the full redemption that He accomplished
in their behalf and trust in His faithfulness alone. This
requires of us a breaking out of the mold of our past insecurities
and an entering into the security of our being seated with
Him in His Throne, at the right hand of all power and authority.
Here, as we rest in His victory, the Holy Spirit who brought
Him forth from what seemed to be a total defeat, will also
lift us from our place of discouragement and vacillation into
an overcoming victory in His presence.
Each of us desires to be wanted, appreciated, and understood,
as this is built within our makeup. Since we were created
in His likeness, this desire is also in the One who created
us. Thus, the Lord desires that we come to Him alone in trust
and appreciation for His redemption in our behalf. The vacillations
in our faith can rob us of our being able to give this satisfaction
to our Lord.
Have you ever felt, when others are entering in or being
blessed, that "this" is for everyone but me? If
only we could realize the potential that rests within us in
relation to our new creation life, we would be able to rise
above the limitations that we place upon ourselves, and enter
into all that the Lord has made available for us.
During the times when the Lord is able to lift us into His
presence for even a few short moments, when "the eyes
of your understanding being enlightened," sense that
there is a far greater potential within us than we had realized.
The Lord greatly desires to open this buried treasure and
fill it with Himself. Thus, "Deep calleth unto deep."
There is a higher dimension of communion with our Lord that
He seeks to bring us into. It is not only our sin nature with
which the Lord is dealing, but also He is dealing with our
willingness to settle for less. The seemingly "good things"
that rob us of the highest to which He is calling us.
There are three areas by which we move into spiritual stability.
First, "That I might know Him."
This speaks of information about the Lord, but beyond this,
it speaks of an intimate "knowing" the Lord as a
person. We are to come to a recognition, not only of His presence,
but of His person and feelings, and thus respond to Him accordingly.
Through regeneration, we are made a member in particular of
His Body, a part of the corporate Christ, and we should relate
to and respond to all that is in the Head, our Lord Jesus
Next, that I may know "the power of His resurrection".
This entails a process of testing and proving. Those who
have a proven testimony, in which there is a demonstration
of His life and power, have had a deep personal experience
with the Lord. They have gone through severe testings and
have personally experienced deliverance through the power
of God. They have paid a price for what they have.
God is not a respecter of persons. If he were to arbitrarily
hand out power ministries, then He would of necessity need
to give these to all who came and asked. These are reserved
for those who have paid a high price in their identification
with Him. The Word tells us that "Many are called but
few are chosen." Another way to say this is, "Many
are called, but few will pay the price in order to be chosen"
Then is the "fellowship of His sufferings."
This is not the fellowship of our sufferings, but our fellowship
with Him in His sufferings. The Lord suffers over our spiritual
dullness. He has so much to give and so few who are willing
and sensitive enough to receive.
There is a longing in the heart of the Lord for a people
who will relate to Him in each of these areas. There is a
"deep" that is crying out to a "deep"
within us, that He might find the satisfaction which He anticipated
when He created us.
As we become able to rest in His presence, and allow Him
to bring us into this deeper identification with Him, He will
lead us through experiences which previously would have thrown
us into fear and confusion.
Now we can walk in confidence with Him through these, in
communion with Him as we see Him alone.